Time to Mock The Scousers – Chelsea Torres Songs
It is clear that Liverpool fans have not got the Fernando Torres banter and have well and truly taken the bait as Chelsea fans have spent the last few weeks winding them up about their former hero deciding to swap the North West of England for the South West of London.
Liverpool fans are stereotyped in the footballing world of banter as thieves in the same way that Manchester United fans are branded prawn sandwich eaters from London and Chelsea are accused of having no history.
The Fernando Torres song, banner and shankly gates were all designed to mock this stereotype and the irony that we had ‘stolen’ there most prized asset something. I mean this is a club whose fans are famous for robbing their players houses whilst they are playing in Europe, something that may not be an issue next season.
Although I must admit if someone robbed my house of valuables and left me £50m I probably wouldnt complain too much, unless I had to take care of Andy Carroll and keep him supplied with Jagerbombs and barcardi breezers of course.
Even having lost my Xbox and Laptop, I would have most likely made a tidy profit and still had money left other for something more exotic.
I was emailed personally on numerous occasions at the beginning of February by less than polite Liverpool fans (few of whom I think are Liverpudlians) telling me that Chelsea fans had ‘No imagination stealing our song and our flag’
If anything I think the reverse has been achieved, stealing the Torres song (which incidentally we stole years ago for Kalou for the same ironic reasons) and getting an exact copy of the Liverpool Torres banner (in Blue of Course) was the best way to wind up fans of a club of which we have nothing but contempt.
Note -These songs are just lighthearted getting alot of emails from angry Liverpool fans, can I just make it clear that eChelseaFC did not sign Torres so the foul mouthed emails should really be sent to someone that might care.
To be fair if your a Liverpool fan reading this, the post has already had its desired effect, but if you want learn the lyrics I have left them below for your perusal (that means for you to read).
Chelsea’s Number 9
You’ll always walk alone he said -Torres, Torres !
They bought the lad from sunny spain, he scored a few then grew a brain!
Fernando Torres, Chelsea’s new number 9!
He’s still our number 9
He’s now a blue he was a red, Torres! Torres!
He left the Kop to join the shed Torres! Torres!
He used to go out on the rob, but now he’s got a proper job Fernando Torres, Chelsea’s no.9!!!
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